Forever and Ever Ago

I feel like it has been absolutely forever since I did anything remotely creative. I've have certainly been taking in lots of stuff, but the output has been shoddy at best.

How does it come to this? How can one or two things in your life completely suck the muse from your being? Does your psyche condone it or do you even know that it's happening? One of the reasons that I have been less inclined to blog is because I feel like my voice has been ripped from me...or have I silenced that part of myself?

I really feel icky at times like these when I don't have anything interesting to say. I mean let's face it, being boring should be a crime. A misdemeanor, issued by fine, but a crime nevertheless. So I offer my pleas to the overlords of the Internet and beg forgiveness for the nonsensical drivel that I'm posting right now, but what can I say? I need to get the proverbial juices flowing once again even though I feel like one of the little twits in a tween novel complaining that nothing ever happens in this town right before the old mill blows up or the vampire descends into their midst.

So I should probably be careful, as this feeling usually means that something is about to happen.

On the other hand, I am experiencing pretty strong emotions right now. Mostly frustration and stifled--I feel more frustrated with myself than anything else because I feel stifled and yet I have not yet made change. I have not made change because that great idea eludes me (for what to change to). I am frustrated because I know I have the brain power to figure this out, but it's not happening.

Now sometimes these epiphanies don't happen for a reason. Sometimes you can't see the forest for the trees because you're not ready to see it. If under some circumstances you go ahead and see it, you won't fully grasp and comprehend the coolness of the picture because other things have not yet happened to make you ready. It's like you keep missing this episode of your favorite tv show that you heard was really hilarious. You missed the first airing. You set your DVR and it malfunctioned and recorded some infomercial for 30 minutes. You try to get someone else to tape it for you and now they are so busy that you can't get over to their house. You get so frustrated that you end up reading a freaking book, of all things, just to amuse yourself until you can get your friend on the phone. This book does indeed amuse and delight and you forget about the tv show for at least one night. Then your friend finally checks their voicemail, confirms that they have the show locked and invites you over for laughter, popcorn and alcoholic beverages. While watching the show, you realize that it makes a reference to the very book to just read the other night. You laugh all that much harder because you get the inside joke especially made for the people that have read the book and watched the show. You have a great time with you friend, feel like you cracked the code with your decoder ring and learn this very simple lesson (if you still paying attention):

All things in good time.